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Job News and a Tough Decision

October 20th, 2015 at 09:24 am

Well the good news is that the vet called me this morning and said they loved working with me, and that I'm hired!!! Big Grin

I start tomorrow.

The tough news is that while I was on the phone with the vet my old job called... Apparently their secretary quit this morning, and the pastor was calling to beg me back again. I feel just horrible. For those who don't know, I worked for my church for 3.5 years, and quit in January to pursue Web Design. It did have it's perks. I worked mostly alone, and I could take off whenever, or leave early, surf facebook, etc. But it was a very stressful job, 5 days a week, with only 30 hours, 2 days were split shifts. They would call me at night, I would have to come in on weekends, lots of responsibility, and last minute emergencies, etc. They have been struggling to find a replacement ever since then, and I've been asked dozens of times to come back.

I had to tell him that I just accepted a new job offer, and I'm sure he is hurt since I don't want their job but I took another... It was just too much for me to handle all the stress and days and do the web design. The vet job is only 2 or 3 days a week, and it's over after my 5 hour shift. No stress no mess.

Now he is trying to offer me just working a day or two, and a significant pay raise. Ugh.

I feel guilty. I see these people several times a week, and they are really struggling. He says no pressure, but he was practically crying and asking what he could do to change my mind. And it's apparent they are falling apart and need my help. So while there is no "pressure" there is a LOT of implied pressure.

I will talk to my husband, but he is going to say no way. I have to agree, I don't think I want to take on 3 jobs, even if it is only 1 day a week.

But we will see. I think I need to try out the vet job and see how I handle that before I tack on any additional work. But it's hard to turn down a friend that really needs my help. It's so hard to stand strong, especially when I get asked by numerous well meaning people every week. When it's all going down the crapper everyone looks at me to fix it. I guess I should feel honored since I excelled at my job, but it puts a lot of burden on me.

12 Responses to “Job News and a Tough Decision”

  1. jokeabee Says:

    Do you think if you were honest with him about why the job didn't work out for you ( the amount of stress, unpredictability of schedule, having to be on-call for the last minute emergencies and being called at home once your day was over) it might help him realize that the demands he's put on the position will make it very difficult to fill? It seems to that the job makes some pretty unreasonable demands and if they were eliminated it might be easier to find someone who is both able and willing to take the position.

  2. klarose Says:

    I think they realize it's a tough job. But they've gotten spoiled in the fact that they had always found someone to do it. The lady before me worked for 8 years. They are realizing now that no one wants it. They are trying to find volunteers to break it down, and lighten the work load. Then they are wanting me to do the hard/important stuff only.

    They did eliminate some of the demands for the last person that just quit. She wasn't required to come to any of the services. Which took her down to only 4 days a week, and no split shifts or weekends. But apparently it was still too much. Although she seemed like a pretty lazy and incompetent worker. I think most people could handle it.

  3. ceejay74 Says:

    Counting your goat-raising and selling, you already have 3 jobs! I'd help them get the word out about the job opening, but it doesn't seem realistic for you to take it on.

  4. Bluebird Says:

    Please don't go back to the old job. I remember how miserable and stressed you were. I would be offended that they are offering you less hours and especially a raise! They could have done that when you gave your notice. It may start off ok, but it will probably go back to the same issues you had previously because they know they can take advantage of you. Just my two cents! Smile

  5. snafu Says:

    I'm not sure if you wanted opinions... I believe you'll like get more job satisfaction working at the vets with a pleasant team and opportunities to make a real difference.

    Jokeabee laid it out so well. I recall your being so upset with the demands of the church job that you wrote it affected your ability to sleep. While the Pastor likely has the best of intentions, the job will ultimately demand more hours, split shifts, weekends, evening call backs, stressful phone calls, unpleasant congregants and all the other irritants that made your replacement quit. With winter coming, how many miles of scary driving conditions and what will that cost?

  6. creditcardfree Says:

    It sounds like your new job came at just the right time! Congratulations. I think your gut knows what is right. And feeling guilty or bad for someone is never the right reason to take a job. If you were to do ANY paid work for the church, it should clearly be spelled out what you will and will not do, with defined pay and hours. And whatever you agree to should make you feel good about doing it. Not guilt or sadness for others.

  7. crazyliblady Says:

    Congrats on the new job.

  8. CB in the City Says:

    Take the new job and don't look back! Honestly, if they can't keep anyone in that position there are reasons, and they have to address them. They can't just guilt someone into meeting their demands. Which is what they are trying to do to you. You don't want that job. Case closed.

  9. klarose Says:

    Thanks guys! I know that I want to move on. It took me a long time to quit that job because of the guilt, and I thought I was finally rid of it, but here I am stressing about it again... It's not healthy, that's for sure. Thanks for reminding me to stick with my guns. Don't want to let it ruin the happy fact that I got a new fun job. Smile

  10. klarose Says:

    I also wanted to add that I can say no. I have/do. I've said no over and over, and they just keep asking, and asking, "what could we do to change your mind?" "could you work just a few hours?" etc. They won't let it go, and that is what is wearing on me. Also, being the sensitive person that I am, it's hard for me to watch the train wreck and not help.

    But I think creditcardfree is spot on. I do not want the job. It doesn't make me feel good, and I agree that no one should do something they are quilted or coerced into doing. They are trying to force me into doing it, without really caring about how I feel. I understand they are in a tight spot. But there are a lot of other people in the church that could/should step up, instead of putting it all on me like it's my fault things are falling apart.

  11. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    I'm with the others. Stay strong and let them know they can't have you back.

    Congrats on the vet job!

  12. PatientSaver Says:

    It may be hard to watch a train wreck, but this is not YOUR train wreck. Walk away.

    I have a friend and neighbor who also works as an accountant and a lot of other things for a Jewish synagogue, and it's the same story i hear from her about the crazy demands, low pay and long hours. Apparently, religious organization are not above squeezing everything they can out of their employees.

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